Are You Considering a Divorce?
Some pre-divorce steps to take if you are considering divorce but want to see if your marriage can be saved. Consider speaking with a professional who is objective and has been trained to work with people in your situation. Contact a marriage counselor, psychologist, or psychiatrist and inquire whether they charge on a sliding scale (based on your income) – many do and can be reasonably priced. If you are not successful with one counselor, consider trying another before giving up; they may simply not be a good fit for you. If your spouse refuses to accompany you, you can always go by yourself at first.
Consider hiring someone to assist you in communicating with your children.
Whether you decide to seek counseling for your marriage or for yourself, if you have children and are considering divorce, you should consult with a mental health professional.
A professional can assist you in determining how to approach them about what is going on at home, reassuring them that they are not at fault, and informing them about the divorce if that is what you decide to do.
Although divorce is common in our society and adults may be accustomed to the idea of people divorcing, children are unprepared for the idea of their family changing, which can be traumatic. Do not wait to see how your children react; instead, collaborate with your spouse and seek advice on how to help your children get through this difficult time.
Gather your documents.
Before meeting with a lawyer, gather information about your finances and possessions. Make a timeline of important dates in your marriage (for example, when you met, married, when your children were born, when you or your spouse graduated, earned degrees, got promotions, and started or stopped important jobs).
Bring all of this information with you when you first meet with your lawyer. The better prepared you are, the more a lawyer can assist you and the more you will get out of your meeting. Before discussing divorce or separation with your spouse, you should obtain copies of these documents and take photographs of important belongings, as things can go missing when belongings are divided or people’s feelings are hurt.
Consider collaborating to break up
Consider consulting with a collaborative law specialist.
During the collaborative law process, both spouses agree to try to reach an agreement on the issues in their divorce (instead of having a judge resolve disagreement after a trial).
Experts such as accountants and psychologists who are independent and unbiased may be used in the process. If, after working in good faith, the two parties are unable to reach an agreement, they may proceed with the regular contested dissolution of marriage procedure. When this occurs, neither party may retain the same attorney.
Consider your options before posting.
You should not post anything on social media that you would not want the judge who will decide your divorce case to read or see. Lawyers and, in some cases, expert witnesses will be scrutinizing your social media behavior, so be cautious about what you choose to share with others.
Brandon Legal Group
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